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Easter Sunday – He is risen \0/
Matthew 28 v 1-7
Now after the Sabbath, towards the dawn of the first day of the week, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to see the tomb. And behold, there was a great earthquake, for an angel of the Lord descended from heaven and came and rolled back the stone and sat on it. His appearance was like lightning, and his clothing white as snow, And for fear of him the guards trembled and became like dead men, But the angle said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know what you seek Jesus who was crucified. He is not here, for he has risen, as he said. Come, see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples that he has risen from the dead, and behold, he is going before you to Galilee; there you will see Him, See, I have told you
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I Look to You My Father
I look to you, my Father
The one who holds my heart
You’ll never leave or forsake me
We will never be apart
When my heart is heavy
And the road ahead seems dark
May i never let go of your hand
On the journey we embark
May we do great things together
Fight battles hand in hand
May your spirit lead me on
In this dry and weary land
Come Lord Jesus Come
Equip and anoint us, this i pray
May we see a great revival
And as we worship, have your way.
Val Gurney 2023
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Poem – Jesus on the Cross
I’m standing at the cross of Jesus,
I don’t feel I can even look up
It’s my sin thats holding him there
He is drinking from my cup
The wrath i should have bore
For the evil things I’ve done
Why would you do this Jesus
Gods only begotten Son
I look up and see His face,
He is looking right at me
All this pain He is going through
Is so I would be set free
It is finished He now cries
The temple curtain torn in two
People are running scared
They know not what to do
I kneel before Him now
With tears upon my face
He died to save us from our sins
By Gods unfailing Grace
Forever I will love Him
For what He has done for me
Forever in my heart He lives
For all eternity
© Val Gurney
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Dark Times
originally written 7 years this is edited version
Well I haven’t written a blog for a long time as I have been living in a dark time. We all have them. Times when you feel like the bottom has come out of your world and you are not sure whats going on. You wonder where God is, why has He left you , why isn’t He making it all ok? SO many questions.
My dark time was that I had burnout or breakdown whatever you wish to call it, I am happy sharing this as it happens to many people, many have mental health problems from time to time. Maybe this could even help someone and give them hope.
I was so busy at work and it was so stressful I wasn’t getting any of my work done as I managed a team of staff, i was helping look after my elderly mother after work who has dementia and diabetes and had some frightening times , my eldest son was getting married and i was really busy at church being on the Management Team, Pastoral Care team, Worship team, Refresh@10 team and much more.
My body decided enough was enough, I was looking at my screen at work at a spreadsheet and i thought ‘i don’t know what to do or what I am doing’ That was that i went home and was signed off for a month. I was put on antidepressants but I didn’t want to take them, when i eventually did it was the worst thing i could have done. I felt like I had been plugged into an electric socket and I couldn’t eat or sleep. This gave me acute anxiety. It has been 7 months nearly now and friends and family wanted me to go on some other antidepressants but i was too scared. Anyway in the end i saw a lovely doctor who felt i needed to forget these for a few weeks and not put more stress on myself and get out as much as possible and enjoy life. ( i was feeling much better by then) So that is what i am doing. I am eating better now, sleeping better and getting out more and enjoying life. I still have a LONG way to go and each day is different, nights can be hard sometimes as that’s when i worry and things go round and round but I’m getting there. My body still feels hypersensitive which I don’t like either but what made the difference?
Well I believe it was God. For months I couldn’t pray, read the bible, even sing much in church etc. I felt just as anxious about God than i did other things. I was basically fearful of everything. Why wasn’t He bringing the healing I so longed for. It’s in these times that we start to search and search for God and spend time with him. He is there though as He never leaves us or forsakes us. He does show he is there though. Through a friend who comes round and prays with you. Through people, services etc.
But over time I started to pray again read my bible etc. (Many were praying for me. I can’t thank my church family enough for all their prayers and many others from other churches too being so faithful in prayer and support in practical ways. For my wonderful kids who stayed with me and cooked and did everything.)
Its like the light broke through that darkness and started to shine again. I didn’t feel so low, i started walking, seeing people, getting help with the local charity Mary Francis Trust and our local centre doing keep fit etc. I hadn’t sung at church since this all happened either, I stopped my worship band and stepped down from the other two I was in but last week when I was at church I thought I wonder when I will ever get back up there and sing again. Anyway I noticed this weekend that one of the bands I used to sing in was leading worship and I said ‘Lord could I do it? Am I being silly? Could I? Anyway I got in contact with my friend and she said just try one or two songs and see how you go. Anyway after only 3 hours sleep I got up and I DID IT, I sang all the songs. God was so great , keeping me completely calm . It was absolutely amazing. I can’t tell you how I felt. On cloud 9.
I felt absolutely out of it the rest of the day due to not much sleep the night before etc so that was hard as I could feel my body was so stressed. I didn’t sleep that well last night either so O am feeling pretty yuk today but tomorrows another day and it will take time but the main thing is I am making progress, God has lifted my spirits and giving me things to do and giving me the strength I need to do things. He has put hope in my heart again and that makes a huge difference.
If you are weary and feeling maybe the same as me or been/going through a very difficult time, don’t give up on God. He is with you in the good and the bad times and He understands how we are feeling and knows what we are going through. Keep praying, keep reading His word ask Him to speak to you through His word or others. Reach out and don’t give up as He wont give up on you. Ask Him what He wants to teach you through this. Ask Him to stay close and in a way that you know He is there.
God bless
Joy of the Lord
I have had many trials and tribulations in my life but the Lord has seen me through each one. I hate to say it but in life we do have troubles they tend to come all at once sometimes too. Ill health, family members ill, work overload even overloaded with church activities, being unwell yourself and other things that have caused great stress and worry.
However I have been praying and giving all these to the Lord and asking Him to show me what to do and how to pray and what to lay down for a season. And He has. He has given me scripture daily , sometimes the same thing, sometimes by someone else, God is so amazing. People have sent me words of encouragement, bible verses and been praying for me. Do you find in these times a joy that you never knew you could have when everything around you seems to be falling? You suddenly noticed how joyful you are even though circumstances haven’t changed.
God gives us the privilege of prayer, we can leave our sorrows our worries and fears at the foot of the cross. We can leave them in Jesus hands. The Lord revealed to me, I believe , that the joy of the Lord is your strength. The circumstances haven’t changed but we will, I had. God had it all in His hands and I knew that and my part was to trust Him and leave it with Him. As in Nehemiah 8 v 10 it says Do not be grieved, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.
How about you? Is life getting you down? Do you need God to heal you, help you? Are you confused about what to do ? Are you down, unwell or just seeking the Lord for the future?
Then spend some time with our Heavenly Father. He loves you. Read His word. Ask Him to speak to you through His word, His Holy Spirit or however He wishes to. Then wait. Spend that time with Him. He will speak to you maybe through a verse or picture but He will, Take that time to spend with Him. Draw close to Him and He will draw near to you
Life can get us down, trouble come, but lets remember to give it to the Lord. He is our comforter, helper, healer, restorer, Father, our Abba Father.
Easter
Jesus on the Cross
As I read a devotional this morning it made me think about Easter and remember what Jesus did for us these words came to mind.
As Jesus was hanging on the cross people were mocking Him, shouting at Him ‘Let Him come down from the cross then we will believe’, ‘He trusts in God, let God deliver Him’………..
Jesus had done nothing wrong, He had loved people, healed them, blessed them, raised Lazarus from the dead. He is the Son of God, nailed to a cross. People mocking Him. They didn’t realise who He was. They didn’t understand the scriptures. All the prophesies about Him, and there were so many, all came true, even down to the one that says He will ride into Jerusalem on a donkey. But, this had to happen, had been foretold. This is what Jesus came for, no one could save us except Him, we couldn’t save ourselves, only the sinless spotless lamb of God could save us. And He did.
He died an agonising death with nails in His hands and feet, a crown of thorns pierced His head and he hung there, bruised, beaten, bleeding. The Son of God, for you and for me. All for you and me. The agony and the pain He went through. The sinless lamb of God.
He loves us this much. He wants us to be in His Kingdom for eternity. He doesn’t want anyone to be lost forever. He wants you with Him for ever, not lost but with Him. Anyone who believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.
Think about it. Just think about what Jesus did and make up your mind if He was bad, mad, or the sinless spotless lamb of God. The saviour of the world, Jesus Christ Gods only son who came to save you from an eternity without Him. He loves you that much
PSALM 3 – Our helper
David is in trouble, he has fled from Absalom. He cries out to God. “Lord how my enemies have increased Many are rising against me” He didn’t know where to go, what to do, He was fearful, crying out to the Lord. I don’t know about you but I’m in a time where I feel ‘my enemies’ are rising against me. This year or so I have had so many things to deal with, like ill health, CFS where the tiredness is debilitating, brain fog, pain in joints all over etc. Lost a dear friend. Not going out as much. I have struggled to work at my job and many more things. My quiet times haven’t been as they were. I am sure you can all relate to this where troubles have come or the enemy comes in and whispers thoughts and lies to you. When we are in a vulnerable place or had a past that has caused us pain we believe the lies. The subtle whispers that take us away from Gods plans and before we know it we are in a pit that is hard to come out of.
But what does David do. He turns his mind towards God. He says, “But ( I love this word, whatever is going on there is an answer) But You Lord are a shield around me, My glory and the One who lifts my head”. This is what we need to do. When things are overwhelming us, put our focus back on God. Keep Him and His word in focus. Remember things He has done in the past. Remember how much He loves you. I know its hard sometimes when its all coming at us at a 100 miles an hour but turn direction, turn your eyes on Him. Read His Word get it deep into your heart and mind again. Worship Him however we feel He is worthy of our praise and this lifts us up into His presence where things seem so different.
David goes on to say I was crying out to the Lord with my voice, and He answered me from His holy mountain and I laid down and slept. This teaches us that when we are low, afraid and hurting, God is there. He does hear our cries for help. He is our Heavenly Father who loves us so much. So cry out to Him. God enabled David to take that rest that he so needed to strengthen him. He knows what we need. Remember Elijah, he was depressed ran away but God sustained him, God knows what we need and sometimes its rest, just simple get away from it all rest. Surrendering all to God lifts it into the hands of the one who loves us so much.
Heavenly Father, Would you help us to rest in you today. Would you draw along side us and remind us of how much we are loved. We are so worried about many things as Martha was but Lord you have said come away with me, spend time with me and You will give us rest. We come. We come to the one who loves us, the one we love. You are our Saviour, Lord, King, Healer , Lover of our souls. Husband who says come my bride, Lord we come and rest in You, in Your precious name Lord Jesus Christ, Amen
Learning to be in Gods presence again.
Its a time of struggling and learning what your body can and can’t do when you have not long been diagnosed with CFS. I never understood fully how hard it was, from listening to friends who have it, but now I know, Tiredness and fatigue should be written as exhaustion, Low mood should be written as a dark place with anxiety and depression. Not being able to cook and do the things you did, should be written as the hardest thing and so I could go on. However, as I’ve got very low with this, I suddenly felt God put this on my heart.” Its a time to turn this around for good. A time to sit, to rest, to grow, to listen, to reach out to others, to cry, to pray, to meditate on Gods Word and just simply be” In fact, it remined me of a couple of other people that had mentioned to me as well to just simply be with Him.
So I thought…… I cant do much at times like this as I’m sure others cant either but we can sit with our Heavenly Father and just be. He knows how you are feeling He knows and understands that you may not be able to stay long at the moment but come and be, just simply be with Him. He is with us always but taking that time to just rest in your special place with God will help so much. He cares for you, He understands and He will meet with you, maybe just in a small way at the moment but as time goes on this will get better I am sure. We will realise how much we have grown in this time of darkness. I felt, as this only started a short while ago for me, that He seems so silent, a million miles away but I think this may have been because I’ve been struggling with a lot this last year and CFS was the ‘icing on the cake’. CFS drains you and isolates you and you have no energy etc and I don’t know about you but my time with God has not been that good recently because of all this. Not because I have stopped believing but because its been a physically and mentally hard time. However, I believe, the light will come again. He is a good God, a faithful God and He is with us always. Even though we may not see it now He is working. We will know His love, peace and wonderful presence shining through the darkness. Heaven may seem silent for now but just simply be and when the time is right He will speak to us again but for now just rest with Him. Simply be, as He understands. He will bring beauty out of the ashes and give us a garment of Praise Keep looking, keep trusting He is a heartbeat away.
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Matthew 4 v 4
Man Shall not live on bread alone but on every Word that comes out of the mouth of God
I have been suffering lately with CFS and its quite bad at the moment, exhaustion, low mood, depression and anxiety and my time with the Lord hasn’t been that great as I am just resting and watching TV as I can’t do much else. I haven’t been able to read my bible that much or spend much time with God either which I have found very upsetting and hard. However, two people have said just go into your quiet room and just be. If I cant pray or read Gods word just be. He knows and understands, So that’s what I have been doing. And today I believe God gave me this
I had just finished praying this morning and I heard in my heart the words. “Man shall not live on bread alone but on every word that comes out of the mouth of God”. I sat there quietly wondering if it was me or really God but realised it must be God. Only He would put a random verse into my mind, especially when it was just what I needed. So I thought about this word and mulled it over in my mind. Food sustains us physically but only the word of God can sustain us spiritually in times of fear, sickness, troubles worries etc in every area of our lives. The enemy will often come and say, “did God really say…..?” But our enemy comes to kill, steal and destroy and one of his tactics is to feed us lies Lies about yourself, lies about God and much more including distorting Gods word, but if you have been feeding on the word of God and have it in your heart you will have the ammunition you need, Gods word, and can declare Gods truth instead. Declare it all day if you have to but don’t give the enemy a foothold. Don’t listen to him. Whatever your facing declare Gods truth. Feed on it as a cow would as it eats the grass. We need to be like that as we read Gods word. Read it, regurgitate it, chew it over again and again. Get it into our hearts, minds and spirit. Let Gods word feed you, go deep. In times of trouble or need it will come to mind and we can declare Gods truth but it will also change our mindsets if these are wrong too. Take Gods word like medicine and declare it, repeating it will change your neurological pathways and where you once had wrong beliefs these will change over time.
God has given us His written word so we can read it, learn from it and keep it in our hearts so that we have the Sword of the Spirit whenever the enemy tries to weaken our walk with God or our time with Him. Maybe you are in a place like I am at the moment where ill health is causing you to be so tired and and unwell that its hard to do much at all but if the Word of God is hidden in your hearts then when the enemy comes saying lies in your mind you can declare Gods truth over your life and bring life to the situation. If the enemy is attacking then keep your armour on and declare Gods word. He is a good God a faithful God and he is with you in every situation. A song I heard a while back was by Casting Crowns “voice of Truth” its well worth a listen 🙂
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Poems and Words of Faith 